Monday, November 2, 2015

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Too old for this shit.

   I was asked earlier where someone can get my music.  I said "all the usual internet sites and out of the boxes in my basement".  Turns out I was mostly wrong.  Apparently I let my contracts lapse with most of the usual internet sites so there's about one place you can download them now.

   "So I should fix that"...I thought for a moment.  No.  Screw it.  It's available at http://jeffersonfox.bandcamp.com and that's good enough.  If anybody finds it I'll be just tickled.  If they don't I'll be just tickled.

   You may ask yourself: "Why's this guy not more interested in promotion?" or say to yourself "maybe this is a ploy: some type of reverse psychology thing."  No.  I'm just not interested.  Bandcamp is easy and it's already done and the 400 ever-changing other sites that I don't want to update constantly just annoy me and I'm glad that shit expired.  I still like music, making music, and putting together things that resemble records.  Hell I might even do it again someday...but...I'm too old for this shit.  The internet and the Instant Gratification Nation have fucking exhausted me.  I don't have the time or the money to make another 'Animule' production happen and if I did I probably wouldn't because the only point in that would be to try to make a living at music and I don't want to tour enough to make that happen and I'm well aware that the depressing crap I write is not ever going to be "popular" so I'm not going to make a bunch of money at it.  Oh well.

   You may ask yourself: "If he knows the depressing crap he writes is never going to be popular, why doesn't he write less depressing crap?"  or say to yourself :  "He ought to just use a regular drummer and some electric guitars and make normal music."  And I would answer both those notions with "Why in the Hell would I make music that didn't feel was coming from my own heart and mind?"

   I used to really think that I wanted people to like my music and every now and again that happened.  These days I am rarely reminded by someone at work or in our circle of very few friends that those days ever existed.  I've been recording a lot since those days.  I like some of it very much.  I may release it to the internet.  I might press little shiny circles with those songs on them.  How will I sell them?  Probably not well.  I won't invest much in it because I understand that reality.  If the shit goes viral I'll print more.  And people can buy said shit at http://jeffersonfox.bandcamp.com

   Why tell you all of this?  There are a few people who just keep asking these questions.  Here's your answer:  I don't care at all who likes my music.  I don't care at all who listens to my music.  I'm recording these days so that my two girls may have these things to listen to when I'm dead and because I like listening to these songs.  I like the process of writing them.  It's really hard to want to spend money to let other people listen to my music.  I'm sorry.  I always busted my ass to make the house payment when I was touring and trying to force feed my music to people who really would rather hear the latest and greatest version of Maroon 5 or some cover band doing "Brick House" at the local sports bar.  I slept on couches all over the country and nearly missed my kids growing up and ate like crap and got really depressed and hated my life...in an attempt to be famous or get rich or feel loved or something...not even sure what I thought I was trying to prove.  I guess I wanted somebody to tell me I was really cool...honestly no fucking idea what I wanted.

   Now I want to enjoy the remaining years of my life to the best of my ability.  I want to see my children discover a meaning to their lives.  I want to enjoy my garden and raising a few chickens.  I want to play music for myself and enjoy the process of trying to record it well for the sake of making it sound nice.  I want to get the bathroom remodel over so the drain won't leak in the studio.  I don't want to be famous or rich (I'd like to be slightly richER).  I don't want to compete for popularity with young people who really need that to feel complete.  I don't need to be told I'm cool.  I'm not all that cool.  If you think I am you don't get out much.  I'm pretty much a 40 year old nerd/philosopher who violated all of his own personal views on how a life should be lived before I figured out what I needed.  Oh and I write poetry and play guitar (like 50 million other people)

   So back to the reason I wrote this.  If new music from my basement studio ever, in fact, becomes available to the public it will likely arrive at http://jeffersonfox.bandcamp.com although there's a good chance I'll forget to tell anyone.  If you remember to look every few months and you find something interesting please enjoy it and don't bother to ponder why no one else likes it or knows about it.  It doesn't matter.  Just enjoy it.  Have a good life.

JF

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Ruby Jane Allen (Mom) Obituary

Ruby "Jane" Allen, 66, of Puxico, Missouri passed away peacefully on June 15, 2015 at Barnes Jewish Hospital in St. Louis, Missouri.  She was surrounded by those closest to her at the end of a battle with cancer.

Born on January 31, 1949 in Piggott, Arkansas to L.D. and Ruby Eskew, she and her two sisters, Joyce (Stahl) and Janet (Mason) were raised lovingly, taught the values of hard work, compassion and commitment.  The family moved to Puxico, Missouri in 1962.  They farmed, raised cattle and became ingrained in a close-knit community which remained dear to her heart.  Jane's mother was a beautician.  She became one as well.

She married Elbert M. Fox in 1968 and gave birth to son, Jefferson Fox in 1972.  The marriage did not endure but mutual love for their son and granddaughters allowed the two to remain friends all of her life.

On February 20, 1976 Jane married Michael Ellsworth Allen of Puxico, Missouri.  Together they had one daughter, Kelly Renee Allen (Marconyak).  She also loved dearly Mike's son, Douglas from a previous marriage.  The two devoted their lives to each other and to raising their children well.  They traveled extensively while Mike worked as a pilot for the United States Army, retiring to Puxico in 1997.

Jane was an avid volunteer, sports enthusiast, active member of Brown General Baptist Church, and caregiver both professionally and in private.  She worked at Pinelawn Residential Care in Puxico until her own mother's care became her primary duty.  She came to the rescue of those in need.  She burned the candle at both ends.  She loved deeply and she forgave.  She was outgoing and made life-long friends everywhere she went.  She stayed in touch with those people and she truly appreciated every opportunity to be near them.  She was a best friend to many.

She is survived by her mother, Ruby Eskew, her husband Mike Allen, her son Jefferson and Sharon Fox, her daughter Kelly and Jaison Marconyak, her step-son Doug and Bernice Allen, grandchildren Andie and Zoe Fox, Lucy and Kelson Marconyak, Grace and Rebecca Allen and her sister Joyce and Barry Stahl.

She was preceded in death by her father L.D. Eskew and sister Janet K. Mason.  She loved them both dearly.

A visitation for family members will be held at Morgan Sifford Funeral Home at 5pm on Friday, June 19, 2015 opening to friends at 6pm.

Her funeral will be held at 11am on Saturday, June 20, 2015 at Brown General Baptist Church of Puxico, Missouri.


Wednesday, December 17, 2014

The Art of Songwriting

This article is about art.  It is not about making money.  It is not about gaining popularity.  It is less about rules and more about definitions.  So lets go.

Vincent Van Gogh was an artist.  He created art.  He attempted to sell some of it and was a miserable failure.  However, you know his name and may or may not appreciate his work but his work was art.  There is a guy in your home town who makes a living painting houses.  He has paint and brushes.  He may or may not be an artist.  The defining point here is that painting houses commercially does not make him an artist.  It is possible for him to be an artist who also is a commercial painter.  These two titles are unrelated though the function of painting is shared by the two tasks.  How does that relate?

I don't want you thinking that every test-tube pop star that ends up on the cover of Rolling Stone is an artist.  While being successful does not negate your artisanship the two are not related.  Many "stars" of the "music business" are house painters.  Or rather, singers.  You know...those people at work who belt out Joplin, the little girl at church who squeals out Christmas tunes every year...the people on The Voice.  Any of these people may be artists...as perhaps they create something as well, but the act of singing is a task of rudimentary addition to an already existing piece of art.  You can be an artist who sings.  You can be a singer who is also an artist.  Nothing however, links the two together.  Many singers are just that.  Many guitarists make no attempt to create artwork.  Many drummers just want to know what the set list will be and if there's free beer involved.  These people are musicians.

While I'm saying this I'm sensing an arrogance in my own tone.  There isn't any intended.  There is nothing wrong with being a singer, a guitarist, a drummer or a house painter.  Those are fine pursuits with their own unique challenges.  But I want to be clear.  Creating a piece of music from nothing is an art form.

So now.  You're going to write a song.  That's your goal.  Where should you start?  What kind of songs will you write?  Why should you write them?   What should you write them about?  How should you display your artwork?  Key Signatures? Tempo? ...who cares

Here comes the freedom.

There are no rules.  It's art.

Assembling musical notes and/or words in a musical manner constitutes writing a song...varying quantities of notes and/or words may bridge the gap between jingles, tunes, verses etc but that's all subjective.

Oh wait.  Everything about art is subjective.

This is the best song ever.  You're the best writer ever.  It sucks.  You suck.  It's all subjective.

This is good news for you!  The wonderful news for the would-be songwriter tearing themselves apart over whether what they intend to do is "good", "valid", "smart", "funny", "entertaining"...The good news is it's all subjective.  The good news is that there are people who like Lady Gaga and there are people who like John Denver.  Linda Ronstadt and Marilyn Manson, Eminem and Tom Waits, Elvis Presley and the Sex Pistols.  There are no rules!  You can write whatever you like and present it however you like and somebody out there is going to enjoy it.

This is an important lesson:  Someone is going to HATE it!  That's right.  The art that you create, from the depths of your soul, with all of your heart and mind and effort is going to suck...in someone's eyes.  And that someone may well be your best friend, the girl you were hoping to impress, your spouse/significant other.  That's just the way the ball bounces baby.  Van Gogh's mother used his paintings to patch holes in the roof.

More good news.  Doesn't freaking matter.

The beauty of art is truly in the eyes of the beholder.  I'm not joking.  I'm not trying to be poetic.  Only you will ever know the experiences, the information, the feelings that generated your artwork.  You can attempt to describe those things to other people but no matter how valiant an effort you make they will never truly understand you.  The piece of work you've created should give some insight perhaps but that's it.  You have interpreted an idea, a feeling, a mood, a moment in time...you have interpreted something into a new language that only you can understand.  I'm going to get a little philosophical for a moment so buckle up.  I fear at times that the art form of music has suffered the broad transfiguration of the gravity of fear.  So many people criticize this particular art form that it is difficult to eliminate such fears from the artist's mind, especially wholly remove those fears to the point that they can create work without fear guiding their creation more than their own spirits.
   It's tough to be criticized or rather it's tough to not allow that criticism to influence you.  But you need to remember:

It's not your job to make other people like your work.  That's THEIR job.  Your job is to make your art.  Make your art the way your soul and mind want you to make it.  If you choose to show anyone your art work then they can decide what they think of it.  And remember...even if you don't meet the people who love your art work, they exist.  Maybe one day they'll see it and know that they love your art work or perhaps they wont...but they exist.  It's statistically far more probable that you will first find many people who do not love your art work.  That doesn't matter.

The art work is what matters.  Before you can concern yourself with what folks think you need to do something.  You need to do something good...but wait, that's subjective.  But

It has to be good to you.  So the first song you write may be fit for the trash can.  Oh well.  You write another and another.  You choose to or not to use various influences from other work as you create.  Doesn't matter.  You choose to or not to read books that may influence you.  Doesn't matter.  You create and create and create and now what?

Is it good?  to you?  That's all you need to be asking as these creations come to be.  And then answer yourself.  No?  Well then it's time to make a change.  I won't suggest an approach that works.  They all work.  Leonard Cohen likes to pain over lyrics for years at a time and perfect every nuance.  I don't think the Ramones did that with "Beat on The Brat".  It's your deal.  You may benefit from working late, working early, eating well, traveling, being happy, being sad, listening to other music, being in silence, doing drugs, doing cake...it's your deal.  There are no rules.  One thing is for sure.  All artists go through a roller-coaster of ups and downs creatively and you need to know that going into this.  You will win big (with yourself) and you will walk in circles.

Why are you doing this?  Having a goal is helpful.  "Because it's fun to me" is sufficient but if your goal is to make a political statement then maybe some research will help.  If your goal is make people happy then maybe some research will help.  See where I'm going with this?  Sit on the street, see a movie, watch the neighbors, ask yourself questions.  Do any kind of research you like but LIVING is a good way to research life and may inspire you to write about it.  Some artists benefit from time away from their art.  Maybe write a blog or something.

Music does differ from other art medias in that it branches off as we decide how to capture the art in some form for display.

Recording:

It's a different art form but capturing a song on a device in a way that imparts the desired emotion is very creative.  It's not what I'm here to talk about right now.

You should certainly document your work.  You don't HAVE to record it.  You could write it down but that's perhaps not as rewarding and certainly not easy to deliver to the random person who wants to know what your songs sound like.  Maybe they don't read music.  So you may WANT to record it.  Record it.  Record it poorly.  Do that before you try to do it any better.  If you feel the need to hire an orchestra and get a producer involved than by all means do it but please be advised:  A song is very nearly a living organism and it will grow and change within you.  No need to rush to putting it in a jar.  And here's the kicker.  The recording does not make the song any better or worse.  It just makes it sound better or worse.  Some of the greatest songs (subjective) I've ever heard were very poorly recorded or I only heard them live.  No recording.  I'm just throwing that out there.  It's not a law.

The real reason I'm writing this is to clear my head of conversations I've had with lots of people about songwriting.  I don't think many people believe me but I do firmly believe that the art of music is in no way related to the business of it.  Many people who call themselves "artists" are just people who want to be famous or people who would like to make money at an art form instead of what they do.  I get tired of talking to them.

I hope that someone reads this and realizes that I've given you my permission to do any damn thing you please musically.  If it makes you feel more fulfilled then I think it was worth doing.  If you want to show someone who won't criticize your work (unless you ask) you can send them to me.  I won't steal your work and I may tell you thank you.  I will not tell you if I liked it or not...unless I like it a whole lot and then I'll be your groupie.  I think my email is on this page somewhere.  Doesn't matter either way.

Happy Music Making.  Go out and be artists!

Jefferson Fox
artist

Thursday, November 13, 2014

The Evolution of Stupidity

How does nature change us?  

Mutations.  

   The gene pool throws them out everyday as we are poured into existence.  Every kind of mutation imaginable.  Some of them kill us before we're able to walk, others give us hypothermic resistance or the ability to sense electromagnetism.  Too many fingers, big eyes, white streak in an eyebrow...anything can happen.  And of course, occasionally we get an Einstein or a Dommer as a result of subtle neurological mutations.  

Yay mutants!

Throughout the history of the world a fascinating trend has occurred.  Along with strength, speed and ferocity as needs for survival, the intellect of species has dictated their survival opportunities.  So what happens?...
   
   The dumb gazelle doesn't think to run from the big cat and he's eaten.  That stupidity mutation does not get passed on.  The gazelle who likes to eat near the middle of the herd so the others can be eaten?  She has many offspring who develop similar behaviors.  Natural selection.

   So what of humans?  

Remember that kid in school that drank Drain-O and smashed mail boxes on weekends that you knew wouldn't live to be 30?  Well, you were right.  He died in a car crash after a bottle of reds and a rum and vodka fountain drink, rest his soul, and he won't continue breeding.  The sharp kid with a sensible amount of caution and a desire to succeed will have 3 or 4 kids (though in recent decades he could have had 12) and that cautious intellect will get passed on.  Natural selection.

In 5000B.C. or even 1926 A.D, those two kids had pretty significantly different odds of survival and Nature had a fair shake at the future of their race.  The dumb die off, the smart keep breeding and intellectually, this species of animal is racing for the edge of the universe.  

But then something radical happened...

CAPITALISM.  (You like that?  I Capitalized on that)

So what?  capitalism?  What's that got to do with anything?

Well...

Capitalism was churning out riches left and right in the West.  Mostly in large industry but also in services of one sort or another.  People got very creative with it.  For awhile we humans used our common defense mechanism mutation, bullying, to create criminal opportunity like strong-arming.  If you have nothing to sell you can still sell protection.  Let folks know:  pay me and "nothing bad will happen to you".

Then we got even more creative.

We legalized it!!!

Let's sell INSURANCE!!

Insure your house.  Your car.  Your life, your teeth, your kids, your cats, your ideas, your...well, you get it.   We insured everything.  We even insure our insurance companies against lawsuits brought by the insured for failure to insure them.  Insure people against illness at a rate they can't afford and still charge them when they try to use it and insure the doctor against the patient and the company against the doctor and....   ...   ...

Enter Modern Health Care.

People will pay insane amounts of money to stay alive.  

Funny how that works.  We'll still die but would gladly give up the grandkids college tuition for another 30 minutes on life support.   Doctors and pharmaceutical companies got good!  They began extending the lives of human beings and making crazy great money at it.   

They got So good at it that a race of hairless monkeys with the kinds of genetic mutations that give way to religious cults, Baskin Robbins and Pet Rocks began living nearly THREE times their normal life expectancy!!

HOLY Crap!,,     But wait a minute...     Which ones are living longer?

Is it the smart ones?  The fast ones?  The ones that look over their shoulder for big cats?

Nope.

All of em brother!!

Screw Mother Nature and natural selection!  Doesn't matter how stupid you are!!  BREED brother, BREED!!!  You pop em out and we will keep em alive.  

Genetic failures welcome.  This is the age of 'anything goes' (and a lot of them go to Office)

Stupidity found its savior in the human race.  It found a way to succeed.  Nature is truly amazing.  While genetic mutation after genetic mutation has been tried and tested on the fields of battle for survival for Millenia, we have finally come to a point in history where greed has equalized the plight of nature and that of human desire.  Today, stupidity abounds and natural selection has been thwarted by the sheer mass of our stupidity.  

   Like a black hole, limitless in its destruction and nearly impossible to comprehend...a void that is only detected by the effects on its surroundings.  Stupidity abounds in every crevice of the human experience and it leads us into the future.  You're holding onto it tightly.  

You're afraid of what this may imply.  

You're looking around for an opinion to adopt.  Uncertainty has her hands around your throat.

You have the mutation...

just like me.


Wednesday, August 27, 2014

WHO dictates pace of Ebola outbreak 2015

So.  Americans need not worry about Ebola at all.  ??
   How is it that the World Health Organization can tell the planet that there is no need to be concerned about the deadliest outbreak of hemorrhagic fever in human history when the incubation period is 21 days and the disease is being transmitted readily to health care workers and flown all over the world?
   The WHO website says "WHO does not recommend any travel or trade restrictions be applied except in cases where individuals have been confirmed or are suspected of being infected with EVD or where individuals have had contact with cases of EVD. (Contacts do not include properly-protected health-care workers and laboratory staff.)" note that exception...contacts do not include health care workers.  Really?  They account for 10% of the death toll and are flying all over the world.  The "experts" on the disease who fashioned the "safe practices" for treating patients with the illness...they've all died from it subsequently.  Also the WHO makes it clear that clothing and articles handled by infected persons are a definite threat but they're throwing their baggage on the carousel at an airport near you, crossing their fingers for 21 days and watching the outbreak migrate throughout the world as we speak.  
   Over 100 passengers from the infected area landed in New Delhi today, several quarantined with symptoms and still we hear "no need to worry" as the rest of the passengers collect their infected baggage and airport workers carry the disease off to their homes.  This is clearly madness.
   Historically, Ebola outbreaks have burned themselves out by now but this round is just ramping up at an unprecedented rate moving smoothly from 12 deaths a day 2 months ago to over 100 per day in the past week.   Mathematically, this exponentially growing trend puts the death toll at around 120,000 by New Year and that's IF it stays regional which is highly unlikely with the current practices in place.  What could happen in 2015 if this outbreak isn't stopped is an unspeakable situation.
   Of course I understand that if the medical community sees progress in the fight and slows the spread this will not be the case...and that's what we hope for...but so far the virus is winning the fight in a horrible manner.
   I should note that a Harvard study released yesterday showed that the poorly educated are more likely to fear this disease spreading to America than those with a higher education...so we should probably have someone with a college degree check my math.  I'm probably not educated enough to perform trend analysis.
   Meanwhile, the President of Liberia has fired several high ranking cabinet members as they have refused to return from abroad to the homeland.  I guess they've decided unemployed beats dead.        
   Airlines everywhere have ceased flying into the affected areas, for obvious health reasons and as we all know, because the public will not want to board planes that have been there (which seems reasonable to the uneducated like myself) thus lowering profits dramatically.    
   There is good news though...the drug company Tekmira who signed a 140 million dollar contract with the US Department of Defense to develop a vaccine effective on Ebola back in 2010 has a new investor!  Guess who?  Oh come on...that's too easy.  Monsanto!!     
   Of course Monsanto.  Why wouldn't an agriculture based company get invested in the germ warfare game.  
   On a side note the US branched out on the moral fiber front a few years ago and Patented its own strain of Ebola.  That's right.  We own a US Patent on ebola.  Read more about that at http://www.google.com/patents/US20120251502
Interestingly in this patent you will find that the CDC extracted their virus from patients...then patented it as an invention.  Where would they do this?  That's right.  Atlanta at Emory.  The same place they shipped our first two Guinea pigs during this new and obviously ferocious strain.  Look for another patent on this one I would guess.
   I've gotten sidetracked.
Back to the good news.  Investors in Monsanto or Tekmira can look for huge returns as a vaccine is expected very soon and I would guess this latest tragedy should adequately inspire more vaccinations than one would need to get rich.  Since our Government categorizes Ebola as a bio weapon (and our testing facility is set up in Sierra Leone...) I'm sure military use will be mandatory making this a golden opportunity.  That's what we do isn't it?  Find the money.
   Although I cannot find my source right now I saw in one of the very early releases that Sierra Leone officials had asked USAMRIID to halt biowarfare ebola testing during the outbreak.  Isn't that strange...
   Ok.  Back out of the conspiracy theories...beep...beep...beep.  
   There are 245 million people in West Africa and while the disease has killed far too many people we are indeed talking about a very low percentage of infected people.  Things could get far better very quickly and I sincerely hope for that as does every decent human being.  The past outbreaks were mostly isolated in rural locations making them much easier to handle and maybe soon we'll have this more complicated problem solved.  
   Regardless, I believe taking every imaginable caution would be the way to go here.  Even the director of WHO says that attention to every single detail is the key (even if he does say don't count the medical community when you're talking about threats as carriers...I'll never get past that one).  So if that is indeed the key, then travel should be solely for medical reasons.  A mass exodus from the infected region could spread the disease to a range so far and wide it would be unstoppable.  
   Don't panic.  That's not why I wrote this.  Use common sense.  Urge those around you to use common sense.  Don't be caught dead near an airport.  And most of all, don't let the Harvard study get you down.  You're not dumb because you don't have a BS in business management.
   In the immortal words of Curt Cobain "just because you're paranoid don't mean they're not after you."
   Good luck out there.
Jefferson Fox